Here I go!

After reading so many adoption blogs in the past year, I've finally decided to start one of my own.

This will be a place where my husband and I will keep our family and friends updated on our adoption process. I am also hoping that this will be a place where I can share my thoughts with others who have embarked on this wonderful journey.

So where did our journey begin...My husband and I met 10 years ago through work. We fast became friends and eventually started dating. We got married in 2003 and immediately started talking about expanding our family. We talked about how many children we wanted and also discussed the possibility of infertility since it had been an issue for some of our family members. Although I was told that infertility is not hereditary, it was a possibility we could face as a couple. We then talked about adoption...and that is when a seed was planted in our hearts.

In 2004, Liam was born. Soon after in 2006, Noah was born. And in 2007, I was pregnant again with our third child. We could not have been happier. We found out it was a boy and decided to call him Nathan. We told everybody we were going to have our three musketeers. At my 5 month routine checkup, the doctor couldn't find the baby's heartbeat. He reassured us that it sometimes happens (because of the baby's position) and sent me to the hospital for an ultrasound. The ride to the hospital felt horribly long. The ultrasound confirmed our worse fear...Nathan's heart had stopped beating. I gave birth to him the next day (I was induced) and we got to hold him and say goodbye. The sadness and loss felt raw in our hearts for quite some time. And although we hated hearing others say that time would heal...time did help. I found a quote that best describes our healing process. “It's possible to go on, no matter how impossible it seems, and that in time, the grief lessens. It may not go away completely, but after a while it's not so overwhelming.”

And in time, our desire to have another child resurfaced. However, being pregnant again filled us with fear. Loosing Nathan was the hardest thing we had ever gone through in our lives. For many reasons, we both knew that we could not go through that kind of loss again. That is when the seed of adoption planted in our hearts began to grow. We eventually attended a meeting at our agency and started our paperwork soon after.

The joy this journey has brought to us so far has been over the top. Signing up with our agency and paper chasing was exciting...finally handing over our dossier was exhilarating...AND finding out our dossier was sent to China and getting our LID was soooo thrilling!!! All the emotions we have gone through have compared to the pregnancies of our sons. We are filled with love and anticipation.

We have been waiting for 9 months. And although we know the wait will be much longer, we also know it will be worth it. I named this blog Two Brothers Waiting because this blog will mainly be about the mischievous happenings of our two children as we wait. It will also be about the hope we have of one day being united with our daughter.